I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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