i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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