We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
