i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
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Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
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The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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