i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
