dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Who died my cat blue again?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
