dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
