Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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