As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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