i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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