My balls are so social today.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
