I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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