just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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