In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
