I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
