i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
this will be a night to untag.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize
