just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
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