Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
