He kissed a someone with a penis
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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