yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
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I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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