Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize