i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
what day is it and did you see me today?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Randomize
