i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
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