remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
