is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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