note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Randomize
