I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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