i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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