all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
