..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
