just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
