You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
