I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
