Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize