Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
