Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?

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  (248): I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob? http://tfl.nu/efyh
  Replies (44) Good night (783) Bad night (3406)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny

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  (978): it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny http://tfl.nu/hpxx
  Replies (17) Good night (682) Bad night (2505)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.

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  (256): Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee. http://tfl.nu/nrww
  Replies (136) Good night (5069) Bad night (1065)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that

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  (906): last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that http://tfl.nu/8upf
  Replies (16) Good night (1702) Bad night (5404)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.

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  (678): This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes. http://tfl.nu/jrvg
  Replies (63) Good night (6989) Bad night (855)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.

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  (816): If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day. http://tfl.nu/k8ur
  Replies (16) Good night (8856) Bad night (1034)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.

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  (513): he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk. http://tfl.nu/epms
  Replies (7) Good night (2927) Bad night (803)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up

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  (802): hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up http://tfl.nu/zwwo
  Replies (14) Good night (1058) Bad night (5698)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.

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  (251): Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call. http://tfl.nu/u2ur
  Replies (8) Good night (1276) Bad night (4042)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.

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  (952): Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you. http://tfl.nu/1zuw
  Replies (13) Good night (1257) Bad night (3944)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage

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  (845): you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage http://tfl.nu/ot1n
  Replies (4) Good night (4146) Bad night (801)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.

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  (480): Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan. http://tfl.nu/ryui
  Replies (5) Good night (3207) Bad night (871)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.

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  (402): Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others. http://tfl.nu/fg60
  Replies (5) Good night (1702) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???

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  (231): I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore??? http://tfl.nu/87ut
  Replies (16) Good night (810) Bad night (1432)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies

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  (504): I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies http://tfl.nu/3ufe
  Replies (6) Good night (259) Bad night (586)

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