Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
