Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
