I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
