You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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