She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
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at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
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Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
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