I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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