I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
