so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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