Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize