We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
