my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
