the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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