can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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