what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
