my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
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